I've been feeling depressed and bored recently. I'm not really interested in much and I am so deeply exhausted. There are lots of reasons for it: mourning the loss of university, dreading the big changes happening soon, anxiety about the unknown future. But knowing why I'm feeling this way hasn't helped me shake it. Today … Continue reading 7 of Swords & the Sun: Clarity about depression
Dissociating has been a major part of how I cope with anxiety. It's talked about like it's a super unhealthy way of coping, that it will negatively affect your relationships and could develop into a full blown dissociative disorder. I'm trying to get away from language like this. It pathologizes me when I'm simply grasping … Continue reading Re-imagining dissociation
Today I had the privilege of participating in my dear friend's thesis project about mental health in university. She interviewed me and we talked for an hour and a half about my experiences. At the end we discussed the complex feelings that come with disclosures like this one. I'm used to disclosing my mental illness … Continue reading What if we could hold our experiences of mental illness as proof of living, like certifications and awards included on our resume?
February 13th Today I’ve been grappling with the thought of starting class tomorrow. The thought of being in a block has sent a rising sense of panic throughout my body. I did two readings for myself today as a way of calming myself down as well as trying to pinpoint exactly what was going on. … Continue reading The High Priestess
February 12th This weekend, I keep pulling the Fool (in Celtic Cross spread, daily single cards, mind/body/spirit spread). It signifies new beginnings, starting over, being a small fish in a big pond, and believing in yourself in the face of doubt. The first time she showed up in my reading I was excited – … Continue reading The Fool
I feel weird starting a blog. Who really wants to hear what I have to say and why do I feel like I have to say it to the whole damn internet? I guess there are a few reasons I want to do this (besides that social-media-specific rush you get from being affirmed by peers … Continue reading Being a Human